Not so very long ago, I cared way too much. Not about things that were necessary or imperative, but about things and people that were fleeting and temporary. See, I grew up without a dad. So, unlike most women. I will admit that that huge factor caused serious abandonment issues in my life from a very young age. My dad not being around and simply being careless and aloof in regards to being present made me hold tight to people in my life. Lots of times these people in my life's time had long expired, but I would hold on for dear life for fear of once again being left. No, I was never lonely. As a matter of fact I received extra, super duper love. I was the baby of the family and everyone showered me with affection, love and attention. So much so that I became quite use to the excessive complimentary hugs, kisses and favor. Yep, I was spoiled. Still, the over indulgence of all of that love never seemed to fulfill that deeply seeded longing for what was lost so long ago. Hence, the race for completion began. Wanting to see each and every thing to the end. Relationships, friendships, business ventures. Whatever, it was at the moment. If I started it. I would have to see it to the very end. Even if the clock had struck, the wheels had worn out and the sweet words became sour defamatory slurs. I was not giving up. I'll tell you something. Time, life , trials and faith has a way of teaching you the unteachable lessons of life. You know, the I'll never do that lesson. The yeah, she did that but I could never stand that tall, be that bold or speak that loud. If, your still stuck in that "never me " mentality. Live a little longer. Your day is coming. Life has taught me to love who loves me, keep those who don't at arms length, put me first and if you can't deal with me at my worst, you're not worthy of being around me at my best. If you want to be around, have a seat, take a load off and let's chat. If you want to leave there's the door, don't look back, cause I won't be there. These changes in me aren't to be mean or negative, but it is to preserve myself for those who truly love me and want to be a part of my life. The Bible says to guard your heart. That was a mandate from God. It's ok to love those who you don't like and let them walk away if they don't care to stay. It's ok to walk away from areas and people in your life that are causing you more pain than joy. Remember the door swings both ways for a reason. So that people may come and so that they may leave.
Until Next Time Stay Blessed and Beautiful my loves... #Smooches
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