What most single moms wish men knew

TGIF!!! 

Dating as a single mom can be tedious. Being the sole provider and caregiver for your child and trying to make time to date let alone pursue any sort of lasting relationship with a man can be a recipe for disaster if not done with thought and purpose. For years after I severed ties with my sons dad, I went on a dating hiatus. Not only did I need that time to build myself back up after the break but I also needed that time to ensure that my relationship with my son was in order before venturing into anything with anyone else. I got my feet wet after our split a few times and found that when it comes to dating single mothers most men haven't a clue what they are signing up for. One guy I dated tried to bond with my son way too fast. He had a son of his own and he wanted us to be a blended family after about 6 months in. While that may work for other women, I myself am always reluctant to allow my son to build any relationships with anyone that I am seeing. Not unless of course I am absolutely certain that the relationship is going in a long-term direction. One guy I had the feeling felt like I was trying to get him to marry me and be my sons daddy. (Not Even).

So to clear up the misconceptions of what most single moms are looking for in a significant other, Yall know I decided to add my few cents if I may:

1. Fella's chill we're not charity cases that are looking for you to rescue us.

2. Our time is very valuable. So if we decide to date you. Don't waste it.

3. We are looking for someone to bring a calm to our already stressful and chaotic lives. Help us find our chill and leave your drama at the door.

4. If we were going to be with our kids dad. We would be. Stop thinking we'll ever take him back. 9 times out of 10 he's the furthest thing from our minds.

5. If you don't like kids, keep it moving. 

6. We love our kids and they come first. So if I have to choose between nursing my sick kid and going to a movie with you. Let me know how the movie was.

7. Not all of us want or need to be married.

8. It's my child and even if he's hanging from the ceiling fan upside down, while juggling eggs, Unless we have come to a mutual agreement on disciplining him. Come get me before you attempt to chastise him. 

9. And the biggest one of all, we are not looking for fathers for our kids. They've already got one.

10. I'm doing this thing all by myself and I'm good. I don't need you. But if I'm continuing with the relationship I want you. Know the difference.